Well that’s how I reckon Marcos Baghdatis was feeling right after he was beaten at the Australian Open. Those in the know say it was a veiled message at his racquet sponsor who is no more. I disagree. He just felt like throwing a tantrum. And you might as well be fined for going hard out. Four racquets is always better than one.

Anyway check out Marcos’ tanty. Sorry about the ad. I had terrible trouble finding the footage. Maybe Marcos threw another stirkey and got it banned. Powerful people those tennis people. The ad’s pretty funny too.

“Let them take whatever they want from me,” he’d said, “it’ll be of no use to me.”

This was a dinner table conversation that our family had had one day. We were all in agreement that we’d be organ donors, so when our family was called upon to make the decision, well there really wasn’t one to be made. My brother had made his wishes clear and we honoured them.

We found out later that people ranging from a toddler to mothers to grandfathers benefited from his donation. Become an organ donor. Fill out the paper work, have the dinner table conversation with your family, make your wishes known.

And if you need further inspiration, have a look at this video. Made me all weepy. Image

Take a look and see if these images inspire you for 2012.

By the way–these Bupa ads–what on earth is Bupa?

 I used to think it was pretty cute that my dog liked to do the downward dog while I was doing this. Sort of like synchronised yoga.

Until I saw this clip of a cat doing yoga with its owner.

My dog and I–underwhelming fail. Image

Watch the clip.  It’s even funnier if you just listen it it. Image

Anyway that’s off the point. Here’s one of Jane’s workout vids where she get Lilien to sing Do It. Tragically I remember all the words. I also remember my intense dislike of the exerciser wearing the stupid white visor. I hate visors–white or otherwise. And why does anyone need a visor inside? Wonder what she looks like now and if she’s still wearing that stupid white visor.

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This is how this remarkable feat was accomplished. Nan Wise, a researcher, masturbated while in an MRI so that pictures of her brain could be taken. These were then spliced together to make the video. Now the truly remarkable thing about this entire exercise must be Ms Wise’s ability to bring herself to orgasm in an MRI. I don’t know if you’ve ever been in one but it’s akin to a metal sausage casing with Doctor Who show noises beamed in at intermittent times. This woman must have extraordinary focus.

So here’s the video. Think about it next time you’re coming to climax. That’ll put a dampner on it. Image

I’ve always been one for a fad. If something new comes along, I’m the first one to jump on the bandwagon. Call me gullible, call me credulous, but if there’s something new in town you can guarantee I found it weeks ago, no months ago, gave it a test run and then abandoned it. I may grasp a fad with unbridled enthusiasm, but like a twenty year old after a one-night stand, I quickly move on to a new conquest.

Does anyone remember the kambucha tea craze? I was there. Kambucha tea was elixir of life; ringing any bells all you Gen Xers? Drinking it daily would ensure optimum health, glowing skin, a size ten figure, the secret the universe, and end to poverty—there was nothing it couldn’t do.

For such a wonder product it worked quite simply. You obtained a dinner plate sized mushroom, placed it in a container, covered it with tea and sugar and let it grow for a week in a dark, cool place, then—hey presto, mushroom juice. Sounds like compost, but no, it was the key to a long and healthy life.

Weight loss fads—tried them all—first. Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Atkins, The Zone, and Cabbage Soup are old friends. There’s been green tea, home gyms, and I even had one of the original Jane Fonda tapes which I had to hide from my husband who insisted I fast forward it to the pelvic thrust bit while he watched with his tongue hanging out.

I was the first to aerobic classes. I grapevined right instead of left causing a human pileup in the aerobic room. I was banned. Oh the shame. Since then lots of people have been banished, but it was me who was banished first—I started that fad.

I’ve dabbled in laser eye surgery, chemical peels, facial massage and acupuncture in my quest for youth. I’ve embraced soy, green tea and shark cartilage. I’ve eaten more salmon than a brown bear and I pop fish oil capsules like lollies.

There were a few fads I refused to engage with. I have never had decals on my toenails, I’ve always hated matt lipstick, scrunchies are a crime against hair and there is no way I am ever going to sport a butterfly tattoo on my behind.

There a few things on my fad radar right now—ear candling for one. This is how it works. A burning candle is inserted into the ear (true—I’m not making this up) and wax instantly melts away. I’m not sure where it melts to, but it sounds intriguing. It is also gets rid of headaches. Clean ears and no headaches—it’s got me already.

I’m also keen to give the vibrogym a whirl. Apparently you stand on a vibrating plate and all the shaking gives you defined muscles, eliminates cellulite and is good for your heart health. It has fad, and therefore my name, written all over it.

You probably think I’m a sucker. You’re right, but there’s every chance that there’s a residual effect to all those health and fitness fads and I’ll live to enjoy yet more fads well in to my nineties. You never know I might restart the kambucha tea craze from my vibrating nursing home bed.  Image

Happy Friday. Image