Take a look and see if these images inspire you for 2012.

By the way–these Bupa ads–what on earth is Bupa?

According to Cara (I feel that we should be on first name terms) the diet is half healthy and half fun. Inspired by a lifestyle that included lots of socialising, Cara developed the Champagne diet. By the way, a glass of champagne has 91 calories. That’s nothing. Less than a carton of yogurt. Hmm–yogurt, champagne. What’s a girl to do.

There is no forbidden food, rather a commitment to healthy eating and “glamourising” meals.

‘I encourage “glamourising” your meals,’ she says. ‘Don’t order the fatty cheeseburger with fries and cola. Instead, get a smoked salmon bagel with a mixed greens salad and a glass of Champagne. Start putting the best into your body.’

Cara’s theory is that eating ‘classy’ foods makes you value your body more so you are less likely to overeat.
Anyway here’s a typical eating plan (totalling about 1200 to 1400 calories a day) as outlined by the Daily Mail.
BREAKFAST: Wholegrain bagel with olive oil-based spreadable butter.
SNACK: Banana.
LUNCH: Flatbread pizza with goats’ cheese, roasted red peppers and mushrooms.
DINNER: Tilapia (I have no idea what that is) with mixed vegetables.
SNACK: One or two glasses of champagne.
Cheers Cara. Love you long time. Image

Anyway that’s off the point. Here’s one of Jane’s workout vids where she get Lilien to sing Do It. Tragically I remember all the words. I also remember my intense dislike of the exerciser wearing the stupid white visor. I hate visors–white or otherwise. And why does anyone need a visor inside? Wonder what she looks like now and if she’s still wearing that stupid white visor.

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Addressing a group of young French mothers he described breastfeeding as “a kind of slavery”.

His wife Carla Bruni gave birth to their first child, Giulia, last month. He told the group that Bruni was “worried about not having enough milk”.
He went on to share his feelings on breastfeeding in general. Though it may be “a joy and a kind of slavery” for the woman, Sarkozy said, he was pleased that it let men off the hook: “It does free men of blame because we don’t have the problem of bottle-feeding. You don’t have to get up at night”.

He does however, “open one eye”.

Right then, I’m glad he got all that off his chest, though here’s a thought. Couldn’t he get up and get the baby and hand it to the breastfeeding slave and then put it back when the slave girl has finished? Just mentioning, mind you.

Anyway I’ve decided that there’s far too much thought put into this when you take into consideration the fact that most mothers breast feed because it’s good for the baby. And that’s what mothers do–stuff that is good for the baby.

I breastfed my child for nine months. Then she bit me.  Then I weaned her. I didn’t once however feel like a slave. I did it because I knew that breast feeding was the ideal nourishment for my baby. It was just a job that had to be done. And there were no bottles to sanitise and warm and formula to mix–that was handy.

So with no expectation of joyfulness and fulfilment to buoy me and no negativity borne from slave like tendencies, I just treated it like a job. See no overthinking. Easy. Image

I’ve always been one for a fad. If something new comes along, I’m the first one to jump on the bandwagon. Call me gullible, call me credulous, but if there’s something new in town you can guarantee I found it weeks ago, no months ago, gave it a test run and then abandoned it. I may grasp a fad with unbridled enthusiasm, but like a twenty year old after a one-night stand, I quickly move on to a new conquest.

Does anyone remember the kambucha tea craze? I was there. Kambucha tea was elixir of life; ringing any bells all you Gen Xers? Drinking it daily would ensure optimum health, glowing skin, a size ten figure, the secret the universe, and end to poverty—there was nothing it couldn’t do.

For such a wonder product it worked quite simply. You obtained a dinner plate sized mushroom, placed it in a container, covered it with tea and sugar and let it grow for a week in a dark, cool place, then—hey presto, mushroom juice. Sounds like compost, but no, it was the key to a long and healthy life.

Weight loss fads—tried them all—first. Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Atkins, The Zone, and Cabbage Soup are old friends. There’s been green tea, home gyms, and I even had one of the original Jane Fonda tapes which I had to hide from my husband who insisted I fast forward it to the pelvic thrust bit while he watched with his tongue hanging out.

I was the first to aerobic classes. I grapevined right instead of left causing a human pileup in the aerobic room. I was banned. Oh the shame. Since then lots of people have been banished, but it was me who was banished first—I started that fad.

I’ve dabbled in laser eye surgery, chemical peels, facial massage and acupuncture in my quest for youth. I’ve embraced soy, green tea and shark cartilage. I’ve eaten more salmon than a brown bear and I pop fish oil capsules like lollies.

There were a few fads I refused to engage with. I have never had decals on my toenails, I’ve always hated matt lipstick, scrunchies are a crime against hair and there is no way I am ever going to sport a butterfly tattoo on my behind.

There a few things on my fad radar right now—ear candling for one. This is how it works. A burning candle is inserted into the ear (true—I’m not making this up) and wax instantly melts away. I’m not sure where it melts to, but it sounds intriguing. It is also gets rid of headaches. Clean ears and no headaches—it’s got me already.

I’m also keen to give the vibrogym a whirl. Apparently you stand on a vibrating plate and all the shaking gives you defined muscles, eliminates cellulite and is good for your heart health. It has fad, and therefore my name, written all over it.

You probably think I’m a sucker. You’re right, but there’s every chance that there’s a residual effect to all those health and fitness fads and I’ll live to enjoy yet more fads well in to my nineties. You never know I might restart the kambucha tea craze from my vibrating nursing home bed.  Image

This is my Gen X Girl column from this week’s Savvy Magazine that appears in the Townsville Bulletin.

It’s no secret that I enjoy a drop of wine. OK, to be fair maybe that could be more than a mere drop, but I’m hardly Robinson Crusoe. Anyway big suck in to me because now I’m definitely going to get breast cancer. Well that’s what some study says anyway.

According to a recent Harvard University study, having one unit of wine a day could increase a woman’s risk of breast cancer by 15%. Having two units of wine a day will increase it by 50%. This is very bad news, especially when you consider that a unit is a piddling 100ml.

Is anyone putting down their glass of sav blanc as this read this riveting piece of information? Didn’t think so. If you’re anything like me you’ve learned to disregard information like this. We’re all suffering from Conflicting Health Theory Overload Syndrome.

Now this is not yet a medically recognised syndrome. I just made it up, but I have every confidence that it’s going to be picked up by the medical profession.

As a practical example of CHTOS let’s take my old friend wine. Wasn’t it only last year that health experts were advocating a couple of glasses a wine for cardio-vascular health? So for the sake of our health we enjoyed our daily tipple, reinforced by the results of another study that says drinkers live longer than kill-joy abstainers. Yippee. Heart beating fine and we’re fun and then along comes the latest study saying that we women are going to get cancer. Stupid sexist study.

Wine’s not the only breast cancer causing culprit out there. Apparently underarm deodorants are a big no-no. Sorry, I’m not giving that up—no one will talk to me. And wide strapped underwire bras are also taboo. That should boost the sale of those hideous ah ha bras that are being flogged on TV at the moment.

We’re also warned to avoid tooth fillings and root canals. I’m not sure that one can avoid a root canal. It’s not as though anyone chooses to have one. It’s more the pain that drives people to pay exorbitant sums of money to dentists rather than an aesthetic but there I go being all judgmental.

Anyway because I read a lot of women’s magazines and spend too much time on the internet I have a wealth of conflicting medical advice that may be helpful to you. So here goes.

1. Yoga does not make you fit because you mostly lie around a lot.
2. Bananas can help you give up smoking. A banana costs more than a cigarette.
3.  If your poo looks like little hard balls you are in trouble. Miranda Kerr says so.
4.  Drinking eight glasses of water a day is bunkum.
5. Your coffee addiction is inherited from your parents. Yes it really is your mother’s fault.
6. The whiskey diet is true. Lady Gaga said so.
7. Swearing reduces blood pressure.
8. Running is bad for you.
9. Soy can lead to the excessive feminisation of men. Put the soy and linseed bread back on the shelf boys.
10. 30% of men do not wash their hands after going to the toilet. Image

Experts suggest that a vitamin intake such as mine contributes nothing to the body except expensive pee. Cynical bunch those scientists.

Anyway here’s a list of the vitamins I take: Swisse ultivite for women (Sonya Kruger says it’s the best and she seems full of life so I believe her.  It also sounds fancy), magnesium (because I get cramps all the time), Cabot’s Thyroid Support (don’t think it actually does anything at all), chlorophyll (because it’s very green and therefore has to be healthy), fish oil (for cholesterol prevention), milk thistle (because of all the wine I drink), glucosamine (for my sore knees), probiotic (because it’s good for me) and occasionally Vitamin B (when I’m stressed). That’s quite a comprehensive list, isn’t it? Wow, I really am a vitamin junkie.

For your info though John Dempster, a hot naturopath from Toronto, has compiled a list of essential vitamins and supplement for everyone’s optimum health. Here it is:

1. Whole Food MultivitaminMultivitamins are a dime a dozen these days. The classic one-a-day just doesn’t meet the demands of today’s lifestyles and environmental pressures. One of the best available today is Ultra preventive X (Douglas Labs). It has a therapeutic multivitamin blend combined with 20 powerful super foods, thus acting as a Whole Food Multivitamin. I take this every day.
2. Omega-3 Fatty Acids/Fish Oils There are many sources of Omega-3s on the market – and with that – just as much misinformation about these popular supplements. In short, only fish oil contains EPA/DHA – the best form of available omega-3 oils. These are most effective via a pharmaceutical-grade fish or krill oil.
3. Traumeel Cream This award-winning product is great to keep around for any bumps, bruises, sprains, or strains. And you don’t have to be an athlete to accumulate those injuries.
4. Magnesium This wonder mineral is extremely helpful for those suffering from high blood pressure, headaches, anxiety, and constipation. How many people do you know with these symptoms?
5. Digestive AidThis product contains betaine HCL – a powerful and safe way to boost your digestive juices. Keep these in your purse or coat pocket; they’re an essential way to get control of gastric distress, namely gas and bloating.
6. Vitamin D Quickly becoming one of the nutritional gems of the media, this nutrient helps to reduce risk of most cancers, autoimmune conditions, and heart disease. But before you start popping massive doses, have your ND check your blood levels to maintain a safe amount.
7. GreensWe’re a society not getting enough fruits and vegetables – our main source of antioxidants. This is a huge factor in terms of the rise of chronic illnesses including cancer and heart disease. If you’re not getting a full ten servings of fruits and vegetables per day, using a high quality Greens product is a no-brainer. Still, eat your greens!
8. ProbioticsThese beneficial bacteria are similar to those naturally found in your body, which are often decreased by lifestyle factors and health conditions. Probiotics can help replenish this friendly bacteria that can be depleted by age, poor diet, stress, antibiotic therapy, and certain medical conditions. Studies confirm that consuming probiotics regularly can significantly improve digestive and immune health. They also help maintain a great complexion.
9. B-Complex If you’re balancing a life filled with work, family, friends, and social activity, you’re likely using B vitamins like a jet engine burns fuel. When we get low on these, we lose our luster, motivation, and stamina.
10. Fibre The recommended fibre intake is 25-35 grams per day, but the average person only gets 15 grams daily. Fibre has many important functions in the body including weight management, heart health, and digestion.

I can see there are a few more things I might need to add to my medicine cabinet?  How about you?  What vitamins do you take? Image

Check out this photo that appeared in the November issue of O magazine. It’s of a woman called Katie Halchishick marked up by a plastic surgeon. This is what would have to be cut away should Katie want a body like Barbie.

But the one thing that is really puzzling me is how they plan on getting the whole standing on tippy toes thing that Barbie does so well. Image