Gen X Journey

Have you seen those family stickers that people are now decorating their cars with? They’ve replaced the frangipani but not the private school sticker that says I’m a (insert overpriced private school of choice here)  rowing/tennis/tuckshop mother.

Anyway I hate them all–the stupid school stickers and the smug family stickers. Frangapanis I also hate but usually they’re on cars owned by 18 year old hairdressing apprentices who drive too fast and will eventually grow out of it.

Family stickers and school stickers–no excuse. They are usually the domain of self satisfied Gen X women who drive 4 wheel drives, can’t park and want us all to know their kids are in private schools.

I’m thinking though that they might be then new Baby on Board stickers. Hello everyone–I’ve got a baby here. Aren’t I clever, I procreated? You know the sticker? It’s slightly less lame than the Puppy on Board sticker that says I’m not ready to commit to a baby yet, but gosh I want to jump on the bandwagon. Ironic in intention, stupid in execution.

So in the interests of research and to see where people are buying these bloody stupid family stickers from I’ve found the site, which I’m not going to link to just in case you were planning to get some in spite of what I say.

Well there’s a whole new world out there, and mummy gets a big choice because as the website says–Not every Mum is the same. So which one are you? Mummy with the laptop and mobile phone (I’m a working techno savvy working mummy), short dressed mummy (trophy wife mummy), soccer playing mummy (what there’s no daddy with this one?) or maybe gym junkie mummy (mummy forgets to wear a tshirt mummy). Just so you know there is no overweight mummy.

The family pet hasn’t been forgotten either. There’s the cute dog, the cranky cat and the cow. No that’s not a misprint because we all have a cow in the backyard. I wonder do cattle property owners cover the back of their ute window in thousands of little cow decals. I think not.

The kids are great, just not realistic. I mean where is the sulky bitch teenage girl. All the boy decals have spiky, sticky up hair. What no Justin Beiber sweep? They really are going to have to move with the times. But you know there probably wouldn’t be much of a market for those ones. I mean people who put happy stickers on their cards are certainly not going to advertise the fact that they have an emo devil possessed teen. So much more fun to pretend she’s tennis playing teen or surfer teen.

So please join with me and rid the world of these pesky little self-satisfied stickers. I believe they can be picked off with a nail file. Just saying mind, just saying. Image