Just a Gen X girl in the world
Monday February 6th 2012

Would your man wear Spanx?

Skincare, makeup, hair care products and control underwear were once the domain of women only.  My how things change.Companies from Biotherm to Nivea now how dedicated men’s skincare ranges. Some of the products are even better than our stuff. My husband got a male Biotherm travel pack on the plane once and my daughter and I pinched everything out of it.

In any manbag worth it’s weight you can find man bronzer, concealer, eye liner and fake tan. Singer, Pete Wentz, has brought out his own range of guyliner for all those Fall Out Guy wannabes out there. Personally I find eye liner on men quite creepy. It’s rarely done well. Just have a look around your local mall. Emos with long fringes and black eyeliner. I’m glad I’m not out there looking for a man (oooh who’s showing her age?).

Hair styling products are de rigeuer for males of an early age (they have to start early in case they lose their hair early). In my teaching days I was once caught in a downpour. My hair did not cope well and only product would save the day. I asked my 12 year old girls if they had anything. No, they were all sensible pony tails and bobby pins, but my boys! I was flooded with offers of wax ranging from superhold to gentle, paste, gel and even a can of hairspray. I tapped into their supply for the rest of the year. It was the year of the hairstyle for me.

But it’s control underwear that could lead to disappointment for we women. According to men I know their greatest worries are their moobs (man boobs) and love handles. All of this can now be cunningly disguised with the use of a Spanx cotton compression crew. So while we think we’ve nabbed a man with the body of say Christian Bale’s version of Batman we’ve more likely got the Adam West version.

I am being a bit judgmental here though because we women have been doing it for ages. We wear padded bras, have drawers full of control top panty hose, Power Panties (how I hate that word), shapers and body suits. The big problem I see with man spanx is the fact that I don’t know one man who would be prepared to wear one. Do you know a man who would spend half an hour squeezing into a shirt that could feasibly be tight on a ten year old. No man would sacrifice the placement of his internal organs or curtail his beer drinking unless he was very, very vain. Most men I know would just wear a loose shirt.

Here’s what Spanx founder Sarah Blakely had to say on the subject.

 
 

“Men’s undershirts have been underperforming for as long as they’ve been around, with stretched out necks and bulky cuts that do nothing for the male physique. The men in my life (and in Hollywood) have been asking me to make SPANX for men for years, so I was inspired to create comfortable and powerful undershirts that provide instant gratification without gimmicks. It’s your favorite t-shirt without your least favorite part…love handles.”

So I’ve drawn my line and there will be no crossing it. Skincare and hair products fine. Man Spanx and eyeliner–no, no, no.

Where’s your line?

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One Response to “Would your man wear Spanx?”

  1. [...] Oh dear, this is what happens when you let men loose in your makeup bag.  I warned you about this last week with my post on Man Spanx. [...]

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